Thursday, January 1, 2015

The Question of the Year. The Question of the Life.

"To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Lord Alfred Tennyson, Ulysses

The question of the day. The question of a moment. And maybe, just maybe, ironically, the question of a life time.

What would you do, if you knew you only had one day, one week, or one month to live?

"When you get those rare moments of clarity, those flashes when the universe makes sense, you try desperately to hold on to them. They are the life boats for the darker times, when the vastness of it all, the incomprehensible nature of life is completely illusive. So the question becomes, or should have been all a long... What would you do if you knew you only had one day, or one week, or one month to live. What life boat would you grab on to? What secret would you tell? What band would you see? What person would you declare your love to? What wish would you fulfil? What exotic locale would you fly to for coffee? What book would you write? "

Excerpt from the film "One Week"

Dearest friend came over tonight and brought a movie.

I remember the phone call a few weeks ago, when she asked me if I had heard of the film, or seen the film... "No," was my reply. "What's it about?"

She simply said... You'll understand, we'll watch it together. The film will take you home and to all the places you were as a child, where you grew up... It'll narrate the stories that you tell me when you talk about Canada and her greatness. Of all the places you've seen and the moments that raised you and created you and let you become..."

I had to promise her, not to watch the film... That I'd wait until we'd watch it together. And that was tonight.

But it was also the story of the film that so dearly touched me, caressed and pierced me. Thrust itself into me.

And in the one instance, home felt so far away and it felt so close. Yes, the touch and the smell and the sensation and a thousand memories and a thousand dreams called hopes and yearnings and desires that all united themselves into a clarity.

It was just the right film to watch on a day like today. The first day in a new year, the first day in a new chapter... Because it reminded me what I want this day, this moment, this year and this life to hold and embrace and experience and tell stories of...

Dearest friend and I sat silently on the couch together afterwards.

Simply because nothing needed to be said. Simply because everything was simply understood. For each other. And between ourselves.

She left shortly afterwards, we just simply hugged and said... "Talk to you tomorrow."

I poured myself a glass of wine, pulled out an old box of photographs. From home.

And then the phone rang and it was dearest, oldest over the memories of years and times and maps and life friend on the phone...

And when I answered, her first question and first words on the phone were... "Hon, are you coming home for a visit this year?"

And it reminded me...

"To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Much Loves,

Angela.

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